name: Christine
Age: 17
Problem:
None of my family are Christians but I love my parents who always give me great advice and are always there when I need them. What I can't cope with is the idea of any of my family going to hell. Why does the punishment have to be so big and how can I be happy going to Heaven when so many people I care about are going to hell? I've struggled with this since becoming a Christian and have never really got a satisfying answer.
Answer:
Christine, you’ve hit on such a big question here, I’m not sure that any of us can give a complete answer. But let’s try.
Your first question is, “Why does the punishment have to be so big?” Well, you said you have become a Christian, so I guess you know all about sin. God is holy and pure, and he can’t share his perfect heaven with sinful people like us. But God cares about your family as much as you do – he doesn’t want them to go to hell, but this is the reason Jesus died! He did it to take our punishment, and I’m sure that you understand that we can be forgiven and saved as a result of his death. It really is a free gift. All we have to do is to say, “Thank you” and accept the free gift of forgiveness and salvation which Jesus offers. It just isn’t possible to reject Jesus and then still expect to be able to have his salvation. If heaven is where God is, and going to heaven therefore means spending eternity with him, going to hell must mean spending eternity without him. So, why would anyone want to spend forever with God if they don’t want a relationship with him now?
How can you be happy going to heaven when so many people you care about are going to hell? That is the question which has driven thousands of Christians over the centuries to spend their lives telling others about Jesus. Even Jesus himself wept when he though of the people who were going to a lost future, without him. I’m sure that you would love to compel your family to become Christians, but each of them will make their own choice. How can you influence their choice? You can, of course, pray for them, and you’re probably doing lots of that already. The way in which you live your life is also really important to them. I don’t know if any members of your family know any other Christians, but it could be, that you are the only Christian they ever meet. If this is the case, then they will see Jesus in you, and may well respond to him because of the way they see you living out what you believe.
name: Eilz
Age: 12
Problem:
I have been close to this girl I know from church and through another friend for a while and I was really beginning to like her a lot. When she was younger her parents died so she is adopted so life is kind of hard for her. She told me not that long ago she wanted to turn into a ned (a sort of drinking, smokin drug taking, fighting type person who doesn't care about many other people - N.non E.educated D.delinquint) I knew from that moment it wasn't a good idea so tried to talk to her. She ended up screaming at me and my friend in the middle of the street calling me stereotypical and saying i dont give neds a chance. I am really worried about her and I think she is making a big mistake as her parents and her dont get along anymore and she is losing her close friends and she is drifting away from church, always swearing and being horrible to other people. I dont know what to do about her. I just want her to be her old self and I dont want her getting hurt.
Answer:
It looks as though you’ve hit on a really important point here, and that is, it’s your friend who is most likely to be hurt through the way she is behaving. You also accept that life is hard for her, and it’s clear from this that you are prepared to cut her some slack and still be prepared to be her friend, even though she is behaving in a way which you don’t like.
Problem is, getting into this sort of lifestyle just makes things worse. She’s unhappy with the way life is turning out for her, so she behaves badly and is unpleasant to her friends. She ends up losing her friends and possibly getting into some sort of trouble, so life is even worse for her, which almost seems to justify the unpleasant behaviour. But it’s only people on the outside who can see this. When you’re stuck in the middle of it, like your friend is, you don’t see the reality.
Hard as it is for you, you probably won’t be able to stop her from making mistakes. But if you can just stick around for her, still be her friend even though you don’t like what she’s doing, she may well come to appreciate you in time. There may be opportunities for you to tell her what you think about her lifestyle, but telling her she’s wrong probably won’t help her. What you do (i.e. be her friend, care about her, don’t judge her), also the way she sees that you are living your life, will probably speak far louder to her than anything you say.It won’t be easy for you, so make sure you have some support – maybe the other friend you mention, or your church youth leader, who are aware of the situation and can check that it isn’t getting you down
Problem:
I am having trouble obeying my parents, because my dad is always telling me what to and seems that he is just bossing me around, and i get really angry sometimes when this happens, and then he shouts at me and the thing is that he never seems to do this to my 10 year old sister and this makes me very cross.
> Please Please help
Answer:
It is important that you remember that your Dad tells you what to do because he cares and he thinks this is what is right. Don't forget that he is doing his best and what might be best for you, but maybe not right for your sister. I would talk to your Dad and tell him how you feel. And I would also pray about it tell God how you feel and he will help you through.
